The soul that goes on

I need to keep this picture up and look at it often when Marko is acting out.
Last weekend, he called Mark a "jerk" when he was made to put his clothes away.
that cost him about 4 hours in his room. He came out a nicer boy and has been better behaved....but he is a challenge....(I remember a psychic once told me that he would be my biggest challenge of all 3 kids) I saw his teacher in the hall
today at school(she is such a patient and gentle soul).......she said what a joy he is and what a thinker he is...she said he is very precocious and says whatever is on his mind.
She is right about that......that is why he blurted out "jerk" to Mark...it happened so fast without even thinking.
Oh.....please grant me the serenity to accept the things that I can not change......he will keep me on my toes!!!
read below, and have a great day.
Love,
Michele




Marko came and jumped in bed with us last Thursday night about 4am.
He said he had a bad dream.
He wouldn't tell me what happened....just that there was a "Hobo" in the dream.

I remember going into my parents room and getting in their bed when I was about in first grade because I had a bad dream.....or that is how I interpreted it. I had a dream that we were at the mall with my mom's good friend from high school, Patty and her daughter, Michelle.
Michelle was someone that I grew up with....they lived in Brecksville, and our families did stuff
together.
Anyway, in the dream, we were at the mall and I went and got a coin from the fountain and put the coin in the bubble gum machine and got a prize....which was a green plastic knife. It was very tiny. I took the knife and stabbed Michelle with it. She instantly fell to the ground.....her body was laying their lifeless and I watched this bright ball of light come out of her and float up towards the ceiling and through the roof and it was gone.
I remember Patty looking at me with these really evil eyes and said "You killed my daughter."

When I woke up from the dream....I was scared. I had no words for that kind of stuff then.....that was like in 1970 or 1971. My family did not discuss death, or the afterlife or that the soul goes on. I did not discuss it with them either......I did not even tell them what happened in the dream....as if I was afraid to tell them because it might actually happen.

I wonder if that is why Marko won't tell me his dream.....I wonder if he is afraid it will happen to him. I asked him about that and he says no. I told him about my dream when I was in first grade....he just listened.

I don't know what to think.....or maybe that is the problem.....I am thinking too much!!!
I do feel there was some past life stuff going on their.....I suppose that Michelle and I have been working out Karma for many lifetimes. I do know that growing up, I never felt loved unconditionally by Michelle's family but Michelle felt unconditionally loved by my family.
Michelle was aloud to call my parents by their first name.....they always hugged her and she always wanted to come stay at my house for the night. I did not feel that way with her family.....I always felt judged....they would have me call them Mr. or Mrs. , they were not huggy people...it was more stiff and uptight....not aloud to sit on the sofa in their living room...it was covered with plastic...not aloud to have a drink with your meal because you would fill up on pop. Later in life it got weirder....when I was fighting with my mom (part of my emancipation...I do believe) and we were not talking, Michelle and Patty would step in and tell me what I was doing wrong......Michelle even stopped over to my house after I argued with my mom and told me I was wrong and how she was on my mom's side. stupid stuff like that. I was later able to withdrawal from the friendship.....a few years after I was married.
It was actually really fake...we never saw each other anymore but Patty would still get me christmas presents and send me cards..... I finally got it....that I was not responsible for anyone else's happiness and it was okay not to hang around people that were negative or "downers" or people that I just did not feel good whenever I was around them. I hung around them after college out of obligation I think....not because I wanted to.
I feel no anger or hard feeling towards them. I wish them well but I am so glad that I am a grown up now and I don't have to hang around people that I do not resonate with.
Don't get me wrong.......I see beautiful souls there.....in human skin and I would still help them if they needed help. I love them but they are not healthy for me and it is okay to leave some behind and to be with the ones I feel connected with.
weird.....maybe that is what that dream was about.
maybe it was showing me how the soul goes on.

it is weird....when one is alive they weigh about the same as when they are dead.
but when the soul leaves.....the biggest part of them goes to a different plane.......so what is this part of us that goes on forever, that can't be seen with the naked eye and weighs nothing.
shouldn't we (and that is me included) be spending much more on the soul stuff that goes on forever and has no end.....and less on the outside stuff.
maybe I will never understand it clearly............
not in this physical form.....and maybe Marko will never understand his dream either.